Q: In what country is Thanksgiving ironically not celebrated?
Q: How many Houston Texans does it take to win a Super Bowl?
A: Nobody knows and we may never find out!
Q: Did you hear about the power outage in the Cleveland library?
A: Thirty people were stuck on the escalator for three hours.
Q: What do you call a Virginia football player with a championship ring?
A: A thief!
Q: What did Green Arrow say to Spider Man?
A: "Don't bug me."
Q: What is 20 feet long and has 5 teeth?
A: The funnel cake line at the South Dakota state fair.
Q: Why is George W Bush considering moving to Canada?
A: Because his penis size will increase from 6 inches to 15.24 centimeters!
Q: Why is a leaky faucet like a cowardly bunny?
A: Because it runs.
Q: What do you call 25 skydiving I.R.S. agents?
Q: How do you casterate an Chelsea supporter?
A: Kick his sister in the mouth
Q: Did you hear about the power outage at the Florida State University library?
A: Thirty students were stuck on the escalator for three hours.
Q: How do you make Penn State University cookies?
A: Put them in a big Bowl and beat for 3 hours.
Q: When can you put pickles in the door?
A: When it’s AJAR!
Q: Why can Bella give Edward Cullen blowjobs at night?
A: Edward's balls sparkle!
Q: How can you tell if a Kings fan just sent you a fax?
A: There's a stamp on it!
Q: Why do dogs bury bones in the ground?
A: Because you can't bury them in trees!
Q: Who was the politcally saavy shark's favorite Newsweek reporter?
A: Fareed Sharkaria
Q: What's the only thing that grows in Honolulu?
A: The swelling from your head from getting jacked!
Q: Want to hear a Texans joke?
A: Andre Johnson!
Q: Why can't you trust an atom?
A: They make up everything