Carolina Panthers Jokes

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Q: Why do the Carolina Panthers want to change their name to the Carolina Tampons?
A: Because they are only good for one period and do not have a second string!

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Q: What did the Panthers fan say after his team won the Super Bowl?
A: "Dammit mom, why'd you wake me up? I was having an amazing dream!"

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Q: Want to hear a Panthers joke?
A: Greg Olsen!

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Q: How do you casterate an Carolina Panthers fan?
A: Kick his sister in the mouth

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Q: How many Panthers fans does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None they are happy living in New Orleans shadow!

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Q: Why doesn't Raleigh have a professional football team?
A: Because then Charlotte would want one.

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Q: What is th difference between a bucket of shit and an Carolina Panthers fan?
A: The bucket.

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Q: What do the Carolina Panthers and Billy Graham have in common?
A: They both can make 70,000 people stand up and yell "Jesus Christ".

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Q: How do you know the North Carolina State Police are seriously enforcing the Speed Limits into Charlotte.
A: For the first offense, they give you two Carolina Panthers tickets. If you get stopped a second time, they make you use them.

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Q: What's the best way to teach your dog to roll over and play dead?
A: Have him watch a couple Carolina Panthers games.

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Q: How do you keep an Carolina Panthers out of your yard?
A: Put up goal posts.

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Q: What should you do if you find three Carolina Panthers football fans buried up to their neck in cement?
A: Get more cement.

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Q: What will the Carolina Panthers do if Ray Carruth is acquitted?
A: Change their offense to the Shoot and Run!

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Q: Why is Greg Olsen like a grizzly bear?
A: Every fall he goes into hibernation.

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Q: What do you call 53 millionaires around a TV watching the Super Bowl?
A: The Carolina Panthers.

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Q: What's the difference between the Carolina Panthers and a dollar bill?
A: You can still get four quarters out of a dollar bill.

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Q: How do you keep a Panthers fan from masterbating?
A: You paint his dick New Orleans gold and he won't beat it for 4 years!

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Q: How many Carolina Panthers does it take to change a tire?
A: One, unless it's a blowout, in which case they all show up

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Q: How many Carolina Panthers does it take to win a Super Bowl?
A: Nobody knows and we may never find out!

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Q: What would happen if Rae Carruth was to kill 2 more people?
A: Carolina's first NFL Record!