Nebraska Jokes

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Q: Did you hear that Nebraska's football team doesn't have a website?
A: They can't string three "Ws" together.

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Q: Whats the difference between the Nebraska Cornhuskers and cheerios?
A: One belongs in a bowl. The other doesn't!

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Q: How can you tell if someone in Nebraska is married?
A: The tobacco spit stains are on both sides of his pickup truck.

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Q: If you have a car containing a Cornhuskers wide receiver, a Cornhuskers linebacker, and a Cornhuskers defensive back, who is driving the car?
A: The cop.

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Q: Why do folks from Nebraska go to the movie theater in groups of 18 or more?
A: 17 and under are not admitted.

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Q: What do you call an Nebraska football player with a championship ring?
A: A thief!

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Q: Why do Creighton grads keep their diplomas on their dashboards?
A: So they can park in handicap spaces.

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Q: How do you make University of Nebraska cookies?
A: Put them in a big Bowl and beat for 3 hours.

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Q: What is the definition of safe sex down in Nebraska?
A: Placing signs on the animals that kick.

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Q: What do you call a Nebraska Cornhusker in a BCS bowl game?
A: A referee.

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Q: What should you do if you find three University Of Nebraska football fans buried up to their neck in cement?
A: Get more cement.

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Q: What's the difference between an Nebraska football player and a dollar?
A: You can get four quarters out of a dollar.

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Q: What's the difference between an Nebraska Cornhuskers fan and a carp?
A: One is a bottom-feeding, scum sucker, and the other is a fish.

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Q: Why are rectal thermometers banned at the University of Nebraska?
A: They cause too much brain damage!

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Q: What do Nebraska and Creighton students have in common?
A: They both got in to Creighton

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Q: Why does all of the corn in Iowa lean to the east?
A: Because Nebraska blows and Illinois sucks!

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Q: What does a Nebraska native and a bottle of beer have in common?
A: They’re both empty from the neck up.

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Q: What does the average Creighton University student get on his SAT?
A: Drool.

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Q: Why couldn't the baby Jesus be born in Nebraska?
A: Because they couldn't find 3 wise men or a virgin.

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Q: What do you call a good looking girl on the Creighton University campus?
A: A visitor.