New York Islanders Jokes

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Q: What song do New York Islanders fans sing before the end of the third period?
A: Nobody knows. There's never any of them left.

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Q: What do you get when you combine all 23 New York Islanders with 23 lesbians?
A: Fourty-Six people that dont do dick!

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Q: What do the New York Islanders and possums have in common?
A: Both play dead at home and get killed on the road!

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Q: Why did the Islanders enforcer retire early?
A: He was ice fishing and got run over by the zamboni!

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Q: What's the difference between an New York Islanders fan and a carp?
A: One is a bottom-feeding, scum sucker, and the other is a fish.

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Q: What should you do if you find three New York Islanders hockey fans buried up to their neck in cement?
A: Get more cement.

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Q: How do the Islanders spend the first week of training camp?
A: Studying the Miranda Rights

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Q: What do New York Islanders fans and sperm have in common?
A: One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.

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Q: Did you hear the New York Islanders are moving to the Phillipines?
A: They are going to be called the Manilla Folders!

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Q: What is the difference between a Islanders fan and a baby?
A: The baby will stop whining after awhile.

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Q: What’s the difference between a line of cocaine and a pair of Islanders tickets?
A: People would pass up a pair of Islanders tickets.

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Q: What’s the difference between Frequent Flyer Miles and the New York Islanders?
A: Frequent Flyer Miles earn points.

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Q: What's the difference between a dead dog in the road and a dead New York Islanders fan in the road?
A: There are skid marks in front of the dog

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Q: How can you tell if a Islanders fan just sent you a fax?
A: There's a stamp on it!

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Q: Why did the Post Office recall their latest stamps?
A: They had pictures of Islanders players on them and people couldn't figure out which side to spit on.

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Q: What's the difference between a Nassau Veterans Memorial Coliseum hotdog, and a Wells Fargo Center hotdog?
A: You can buy a Wells Fargo Center hotdog in May!

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Q: Why are the Islanders like grizzly bears?
A: Every fall they go into hibernation.

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Q: What do the New York Islanders and the Titanic have in common?
A: They both look good until they hit the ice!

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Q: How many New York Islanders fans does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None. Lava lamps don’t burn out man!

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Q: Whats the difference between the New York Islanders and a mosquito?
A: A mosquito stops sucking.